Postpartum: Will I ever feel sexy again?

After nine months of pregnancy and tending to a demanding newborn day and night, it’s hard to feel like a sexual being again. Most women go through a period where the last thing on their mind is sex. You’re exhausted and your body is going through physical AND emotional changes. You may or may not be experiencing some postpartum depression, and your belly is a jiggly mess. (We’ve all been there)

Sometimes you wonder, will I ever feel sexy again? Of course you will, with time. First, there’s the physical healing of course. If you had a cesarean or some tearing, it may take several weeks to feel physically ready for sex.

For the next few months after having your baby, you most likely will be carrying a little extra postpartum weight. That doesn’t mean that you aren’t sexy. Many husbands find their wives even more attractive as mothers than they were before.

Nicole says, “My husband may think that I am sexy, but I sure don’t feel that way. What should I do?”

Here are some tips to get Nicole and you on the road to feeling like your sultry selves again.

• Put on some makeup and some non-maternity clothes. Even though you may not be able to squeeze into your old size, you’ll feel a lot better if you can get some pants with a zipper and a button. Aren’t you tired of wearing elastic?

• Start exercising as soon as you are physically able. Begin walking your baby around the neighborhood or park. Eventually, you will be able to work your way up to daily jogs. Exercise gets our blood pumping and makes us feel alive again, so get out there!

• Get yourself a breast pump, even if it’s just a manual one. This will allow you some time off from your baby – some time off to spend with your partner.

• Enlist some help babysitting. It is better for your baby if you are a happy mom in a happy relationship or marriage. In order to maintain a healthy, happy marriage, you need couple time. Repeat after me. “My partner and I need couple time to maintain a happy marriage.” We know this can be hard when you are in “baby world”, but this is a must-do. You WILL see a difference in your communication with your partner, and you WILL see a difference in intimacy.

• When you get your babysitter scheduled and you can pump enough milk to get her by, get dressed up. Go out to dinner and a movie with your partner. Try for a romantic or intimate setting away from the house – away from the diapers and the baby swing and the bottles. This will help you feel like part of the adult world again.

Do all these things and do them regularly, and you will feel sexy again.

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